A couple weeks ago I received the latest issue of Kinfolk as a birthday present.
Turn the magazine over to the back and you find a tiny paragraph that says this:
"As some anonymous old chap once said, "Age is an issue of mind over matter. If you don't mind,
it doesn't matter." This edition of Kinfolk ----The Aged Issue --- Is dedicated to all things that get better with time: loved ones, food, family traditions and a good bottle of wine. We explore how the older folks in our lives can teach us how to live more fully and how to embrace each new candle on our cake with style and grace."
I don't know about you, but I could talk endlessly about all the things I love about getting older. Did I ever tell you how much I look forward to being in my 50's?? No? Well I do! Every time I've gone to a wedding dinner and the Mother or Father of the bride gets up to make a toast... I get chills, I do! [and I always cry] and then I envision myself giving my own toast at me and Jesse's son or daughter's wedding. I often imagine Jesse and I owning a cabin that we share with our kids and their spouses and little ones, gathering there often and having it be like scenes from one of my favorite movies "Dan in Real Life". I know what kind of clothes I will be wearing, what the furniture and decor will look like, Jesse just keeps getting better looking with age, so I'll definitely be crushing on him even more! AND I can't wait to be a Grandma! Oh my... and i'm not even a Mom yet! Yes... silly, I know... i'm constantly having to remind myself to enjoy the present! "Roxy, enjoy today you FOOL!"
Don't you think though that there is just something life altering about being in your 50's? It's almost as if you've mastered everything you had worked so hard on during your 20's, 30's & 40's. You've become this master, and now you can sit back, relax and teach those around you. You no longer doubt, or fuss, you're at peace.
This issue of Kinfolk definitely isn't helping with the "stay present" issue that I have going on, but it is so inspiring and lovely to look through and day dream of getting older, and doing it well, that I will allow myself today and tomorrow, some future reminiscing.
& another thing. Going all gray... so classy!
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One of the things that I think helps with growing older gracefully is knowing yourself, your style and staying true to that regardless of the current trends. It's easy to get sucked into what's popular, and change your style a gazillion times just so you fit in. This was something I saw a lot of while studying fashion in NYC. After our Holiday break, so many students would come back and everything about them had changed drastically... pretty much over night. Classmates would be super GQ sleek one moment and then next semester - all white and minimal...perhaps they went on tour with Edward Sharpe and the Magnetic Zeros?... and then after that new trend was the outdoorsy hipster who loves all things Pendleton. What did they do with all their clothes? It's pretty entertaining to see these types of transitions. Those who change so quickly, I actually feel bad for. I just want to say out loud "TRUST YOURSELF, your style that you secretly love will eventually come around, I promise" ... have you noticed this within home decor as well? lol...oh man, it's the same thing.
Okay... what's my point? My point is this... being confident and okay with yourself has long term benefits.
Here are just a few that I found from Practical Self Help
The three points are from their list, 10 Benefits of Having High Self Esteem
1. You are more resilient to life's difficulties because you are less likely to give in to despair or defeat.
2. You will enjoy a fuller social life. When you feel good about yourself, you don't hesitate to talk to new people. Each new person you talk to is a potential new friend, business partner, customer, or romantic interest. This is so true. And it makes me think of people I know [and hopefully myself, yeah...gonna be honest there!] that don't seek after friendships that look and dress like ourselves. Don't you think it's weird when you see a group of adults and they ALL look the same? I find it uncomforably interesting. It's basically curated friendships in my opinion, rarely leaving room for others who don't dress like you but ultimately could be some of your closest friends. This is what I call missed opportunities!
3. Fortune favors the bold. When you feel confident in yourself, you are willing to take more risks because you know that you can deal with whatever comes your way. People who are willing to take more risks end up being more successful in life.
Now, with all that said. It's inevitable that our style and tastes are going to change over time, especially in our tweens, teens and twenties... but yo-yoing back and forth, says more than just "yeah, my style has changed" it's saying [at least to me] that there is something inside you that you're not okay with... which ultimately is emotionally exhausting.
What is a way to combat this? Well, to those of you who want to start the process of aging gracefully a lot sooner - here is what I suggest. Put your blinders on. Take tares out of magazines of fashions that you are drawn to, and not what the media is telling you to be drawn to. If it happens to be trendy of the moment, cool. But be authentic to yourself. Create a mood-board of these tares or have them in a binder, where you frequently look at. Creating a pinterest board helps, unless of course you're one of those types who is on there a lot...then I would avoid pinterest [it's a slippery slope folks!] because there is so much consistent overload, it's hard to take in everything and enjoy it.
I created 19 boards total, and got to a point one day that I was like "okay, enough's enough!" I decided that I needed to keep my pinning to a limit. Now I will occasionally pin 1 or 2 things a month, if that. BUT! I do go to my 3 favorite boards a couple times a week and pour over them and take everything in. As you gather together favorite looks that YOU like, you will start to see a consistent pattern throughout...pay attention to that. Pay attention to the fabric, the color, the hardware that you are drawn to. I absolutely love silk, but my husband hates it. You will never see him in a silk shirt, even if that is the hottest thing in town. That is something I love about Jesse, he is so true to himself.
So...my very favorite board is appropriately titled "A Simple Wardrobe" which I started back in 2011... this is my inspiration for how I dress and will proceed to dress in the next 5,10, 20+ years. This is my aging gracefully board. Everyone has a different version of that too! Remember that. Simple has so many looks...you've got modern, gothic, bohemian, preppy, sporty simple... just keep it simple and timeless.
Pictured below is one of my favorite older models! Pia Gronning,
she has aged so gracefully don't you think?!
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Lastly, our friend Summer Bellesa did a post on Babble the other day called "13 Stylish ways to Rock a Statement Necklace" - our Roxy Marj spotted clutch was featured in this post with her uncomplicated, flattering and timeless look. I had to share since it goes so well with this blog post I was working on today. I hope that what I have said makes some sort of sense, even though I've been out of the blogging sphere for sometime does not mean it made my problems with syntax magically disappear... i'm hoping that will just happen over time. Ha! ;-[)
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Okay, for real lastly! As I was finishing writing that above paragraph I remembered that I wanted to share some of MY favorite all time classic, chic, wardrobe staple movies with you all. Here goes!
There is no order - I love them all EQUALLY
The Family Stone
Sabrina [both versions]
Out of Africa
Bonny & Clyde
Coco Before Chanel
When Harry Met Sally
You've Got Mail
The Women [both versions]
Joe Versus the Volcano
Falling in Love